Sonic Youth founding member and rock ‘n’ roll legend Kim Gordon is set to release her memoir, ‘Girl In A Band’ tomorrow. The usually positive musician has hit the headlines after several highly incendiary excerpts were published in newspapers and online. In the passages, Ms. Gordon admonishes her ex-husband and fellow Sonic Youth founder Thurston Moore. The personal revelations have caught the attentions of many readers who uniformly praise Ms. Gordon for her honesty and bravery.
The book is said to open with details of the band’s final show in Brazil. At that stage, the relationship between the pair had diminished and was essentially running on empty. Kim’s memory of the event is succinct and insightful. “Thurston double-slapped our bass guitarist Mark Ibold on the shoulder and looked across the stage, followed by Lee Ranaldo our guitarist and Steve Shelley our drummer. I found that gesture so phoney, so childish, and such a fantasy,” she writes. “Thurston has many acquaintances but with the few male friends he had, he never spoke of anything personal. He’s never been the shoulder slapping type. It was a gesture that called out, ‘I’m back. I’m free. I’m solo.'”
“We had exchanged maybe fifteen words all week,” she continued. “After 27 years of marriage, things had fallen apart between us. The couple everyone believed was golden and normal and eternally intact, who gave younger musicians hope they could outlast a crazy rock’n’roll world, was now just another cliche of relationship failure – a male midlife crisis, another woman, a double life.”
The shocking revelations paint a frosty picture at odds with the warm public perception of the musical couple. “We tried to save it. We were both in therapy and seeing a marriage counsellor, too. But it was like dealing with an addict who was unravelling, who couldn’t stop himself,” she explained. “He and I still slept in the same bed – it was a big bed – but in the mornings, we would get dressed and go downstairs and do our own thing. I could either put up with the humiliation, or I could end things.”
In the end, it seems Kim Gordon might have the last laugh…
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